How to Write a Condolence Note or Send a Sympathy Card

Sending of sympathy cards links people together and reinforces a sense of community and solidarity in the wake of the calamity of death.

Charles Lippy
Sympathy Cards & the Grief Process

When to Send a Sympathy Card
There may be situations and circumstances when it is preferable to express your sympathy in a short condolence note or selecting sending a beautiful sympathy card to send with a note. Used correctly a Condolence Notes or Sympathy Cards is a way to quickly acknowledge a loss.

In these situations you can write a brief personal note on commercial condolence card or insert a brief hand-written note into a hand-crafted card. It is recommended that you follow up the short note with a condolence letter later.

Sending Sympathy Cards - Popular for Condolences in the U.S.
According to research by Hallmark, Americans send nearly 125 million sympathy cards annually. Sympathy cards are a simple gesture of support that provide meaning to both senders and receivers. Sympathy Cards and Condolence Notes are very popular in the United States more so than in other countries.

You can find out more about How to Write a Condolence Note in the article that I just recently published on the topic.

More Information:
Dyer K. 2008. How to Write a Condolence Note. Squidoo.com

Prior Blog Posts:
Dyer K. 2008. How to Write a Condolence Letter. Grief, Loss & Transitions Blog.

Image Source:
Elaine Broskie. Sympathy Card. Some Rights Reserved. Creative Commons.

Coping with Valentine's Day as a Single

For many, many of my adult years, Valentine's Day was a harsh reminder and a reality check of the absence of someone special in my life.

As a medical student and resident physician in training, I found it difficult to see the nursing staff and married student's getting special flowers from that "Special Someone."

I would spend many a day and night wondering, when or if, I would ever find someone. (I met my husband when we were both 36.)

Valentines - Harder for the Single Female?
Perhaps because of the Valentine Marketing that now appears soon after Christmas and the many pressures placed on women to be part of a "couple," Valentine's Day is harder for the single female and the newly single female.

These feelings were depicted on a classic "Friends" episode from the first season, where Phoebe leads Monica and Rachel on a cleansing Valentine's Burning Ritual (Boyfriend burning bonfire) to help them deal with the holiday. Their ritual goes awry and the fire department (with male fire fighters) respond.

Suggestions for Coping with Valentine's Day as a Single

• Have a burning ritual, but make it a positive, cleansing one--getting rid of the old, to let in the new. Be fire aware.
  
• Listen to your favorite uplifting music.
• Light a candle.
• Read an inspiring poem (not necessarily a love poem).
• Take a minute to list everything you have to be grateful for, and focus on living life with gratitude.
  
• Plan a special day just for you.
• Give yourself a special spa day.
• Go to a funny (non-romantic) movie.
• Get your hair or nails done.
• Give yourself the time to read the book, magazine that you've been wanting to read.
• Watch the inspirational short mini-film, A Knock at the Door.
  
• Plan a distraction, such as a weekend away or a visit with single friends or supportive relatives.
• Create a new tradition.
• Go on a lovely hike. Practice some nature therapy. Getting out in nature can be very uplifting.
  
• Take a girlfriend out to Tea.
• Remember that Life is still worthwhile if you just Smile.
  
• Do something nice for someone else - thinking of others when you are feeling down is a great way to lift your spirits.

Suggestions for Coping with Valentine's Day When You're Newly Single

Valentine's Day is also a difficult day for those who are newly single, those who have lost that special someone, due to breakups, divorce and especially death. As with Christmas. Birthday's and Anniversaries, Valentine's Day can be another of the painful 'trigger' days that bring back the old memories.

Some helpful coping strategies for making it through the day include:

• Take time to relax.
• Focus on yourself and take care of your health.
• Make time to attend to the needs of family, especially children.
• Find someone to talk to about how you are feel.
• Focus on good times you shared with your loved one, rather than the loss.
• Pretend it is an ordinary, regular day.
  
• Find a way of celebrating (or not) that will be the most meaningful for you.
• If you need to take a look at other healthy ways of coping with grief.
  

Look over the list of suggestions for Coping with Valentine's Day as a Single and find one that sounds like it would be a good way to celebrate the day.

Sources:
Dyer K. Ways of Coping with Valentine's Day. Condolence & Sympathy Section. Journey of Hearts.
Dyer K. Anniversary Reaction - When Remembering Isn't Always a Happy Occasion. Squidoo.com
Dyer K. Life is still worthwhile if you just smile - An Inspirational Song by Josh Groban. August 2007. Grief, Loss & Transitions Blog.

Image Source:
Sarah Williams. Brokenheart. Royalty Free Use.

How to Write a Condolence Letter

Finding the right words to write a condolence letter or sympathy note may be challenging, yet the benefits can be immeasurable especially for the recipient.

Many people don't realize the importance of Sympathy Letters until they have been on the receiving end and greatly appreciate the hand-written condolences.

A well-written, heart-felt condolence letter is a simple way to show your support and sympathy for the person grieving the death of a loved one.

Find out more about How to Write a Condolence Letter in the article that I have recently published on the topic.

Image Source: Nadya Smolskaya. In Closing. Used with Permission.